How Our Words Affect Others

Hey guys! Sorry for the long silence lately! I have been so unbelievably busy the past few weeks and despite my strong desires to write I just couldn’t find the time! 😥 But! I’m here today so let’s get to it!

Today I really want to talk about how our words affect others.  A couple weeks ago I came across a post from an athlete I highly respect that really stopped me in my tracks and left me feeling down about myself and my journey. I’ll get to the details about that in a second but today’s post I really want to discuss the reality of how others opinions and words affect us. When it comes to the fitness world there are so many opinions out there. Some people are truly there to build others up, some people are there to build themselves up, and yes, there are even those that intend to tear others down. While I’m sure others intentions may not clearly be one or the other the reality is, our words affect others and sometimes in ways we never imagined.

Let’s start with a little background. A couple weeks ago, I shared a post called Getting Away From The Calorie Restriction Mindset For Weight Loss that detailed my experience with my first fitness competition and the obstacles I came across following the event. Before doing my first competition I would have never imagined I would enjoy doing them so much! My biggest goal following the show was to fine tune my training and diet, to not only gain muscle but, avoid drastic calorie restriction while leaning out. What I found following the show was that although I was still motivated I didn’t quite stick to my goals as strictly as I would while actually preparing for a fitness competition. I needed to light a fire under my own ass by actually getting back into a competition. So, late last year I decided my next show would be in March.

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Earlier today I posted a progress photo of myself on Instagram announcing that I will be competing March 11 as well as admitting that I waited until the last day to register for the show. To be honest, I was still scared to put myself out there and actually be accountable for something! I kept asking myself “Am I ready?” “Will I lean out in time?”. While I am still not 100% sure of the answers to these questions I knew to find the answers I had get out there and find out by experience! So here we go!

One of my biggest mindset obstacles came a month ago. One of my funniest habits I have before a workout is to jump on Instagram and find inspiration from all the strong female athletes! I know it’s silly but for some reason I really get excited about going and getting strong when I see all the successes of others! It almost provokes the mindset of “I can do this!” Anyway, I came across a post from an athlete I really respect that was ranting about how fitness competitions are an art and essentially if you cannot afford a coach then you’re wasting your time. While I understand the importance of a coach and I know that having one would take my prep and physique to the next level, at this point in my life I just cannot afford one. So, yes I prep myself. While this may give me a disadvantage it is where I am at right now and I have to appreciate that and be thankful for what I can do. This athlete’s post left me feeling so unbelievably defeated. I honestly thought about skipping my work out because, even if for a moment, I thought “What’s the point?” and I wondered if my attempts of training myself were only seen as comical by others who could afford a coach!

“The person who has the right to do something, is the one doing it.” -Jill Coleman

Needless to say I felt pretty bad about myself and my attempts. Luckily a few months before this happened and before my starting this blog I took an online seminar with a woman named Jill Coleman and the seminar was called Action Academy. One of the quotes that resonated with me strongly was the quote: “The person who has the right to something, is the one doing it.” Using this quote Jill discussed how, in our endeavors we often doubt our abilities by saying “Do I have enough credentials” or “Will others even care about what I have to say?” Jill also discussed the criticism of others and how we often worry about what other people will think of our efforts or if they will judge us thinking “Who do they think they are to being doing _____”. So we doubt are abilities and fail at taking any action out of fear. This quote led to my AH HA moment. If I could personally thank Jill for speaking these words prior to my obstacle I would hug her! Because, at that moment when I thought of this quote my determination was renewed and I knew that no matter how the competition went I could be SO PROUD of myself for taking the leap, training hard, and gaining experience I would otherwise have not gained because of FEAR!

I share this experience with you to show just how greatly our words affect others, even people we have never met. You can build others up or you can tear them down. My utmost hope of this blog and Andrea B Fit is that somehow I will be able to encourage you and build you up. I hope that I can help you see that anything is possible. Just as JillFit was a place for me to find encouragement when I was discouraged I hope I can cultivate that same atmosphere of acceptance, encouragement and positivity. When it comes to any of your goals there will always be critics but I hope you find it within yourself to persist. We will always have doubts but when we allow fear to stop us we miss out on so much opportunity! We won’t always do it perfect and we have to be OK with that reality. Give it your all anyway! Then be so proud of your efforts no matter the outcome. You can choose to do nothing out of fear or you can do something and see what happens!

As I go into the last two weeks of prep before my March 11 competition I will continue to work hard and be so happy with all of my progress. When comp day comes, whether or not I place, I have already won just for pushing past my fears, trying something new, and taking my journey to a whole new level.

If you have ever experienced something similar I’d love to hear from you. How did you deal with the defeating thoughts or fear? What is your go to encouragement to keep pressing on?

Have a beautiful, healthy day!

Love,

Andrea B Fit

 

*A special thanks to Jill Coleman whether or not she ever knows the effects of her positive words!

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